For some reason I think Mama and Papa Jones will have trouble throwing down for:
The Metal Bible: I’ve been saying for years that it would be beneficial for me to give the Bible a once-over and you can’t beat an edition that lends you teen-punk credibility while transforming God’s word into a handy tool for striking down sinners on the subway platform.
The Jesus Dashboard Dazzler: You would think this item would be totally useless for a car less, Jewish city-dweller, but the thought of sticking this sucker to my work computer and monitoring the resulting confusion and unease makes me think it would be worth the $7.95.
A Chastity Ring: I know it’s a little late for this, but I’m willing to go Born-Again-V for the privilege of donning a sweet wedding “placeholder” and throwing a promise ring ceremony complete with laser light show. Even Mitzvahpalooza didn’t have one of those.
N.B. Read the article on the growing popularity of chastity rings in today's Times. You won't be sorry.
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4 comments:
BORN AGAIN VIRGINS DON'T EXIST!!!!
Virginity is a state of mind. All you have to do is believe. Stacia, you can be anything you want to be!
TRUE LOVE WAITS!!!
Signed,
Co-worker
\m/
stacia, i support your commitment in being a born again virgin.
don't believe daz, she's a nympho.
if virginity is a state of mind, then my vagina and I need to have a few words..
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